Flip a Card...

So some of you asked about my new discipline system and I have to give credit where credit is due. My BFF Michelle is the one who began this system with her kids. She and I both taught school and used this flip a card system in our classroom, but I hadn't thought of bringing it into my home. Thankfully, she did! She sent me a picture of her display on her phone and I got to work duplicating it. It took me a while to get on the ball with it but honestly, it is working WONDERS!!!!

So first of all I made and laminated little name envelopes and colored cards in red, yellow, blue, and green. I taped these securely to the pantry door in the kitchen. Then I made a "key" to go above them to remind the kids what each color means.
Lastly I went to Party City, and Target dollar section to get some goodies for the treasure box (shoe box) for their reward each day. So this is the way we have done it. Each morning the kids get to start on green. If they are causing any kind of problem I usually warn them that they will have to change a card if they continue a certain behavior, or don't do something I've asked, etc. Then if they continue I have them flip a card. If they get to blue it is a warning. Yellow is time out and they have to go upstairs for however many minutes they are old, and red is loose a privilege. I get to pick the privilege. For Addie it would be TV, for Berks her dolls, and Parker the computer or DSI or something. Obviously something you know is important to your child. I probably flip their card about half the time and they flip their own card the other half, depending on if we are downstairs by the chart, in the car, etc.

Now you don't want them to get to red by 10 am and be unmotivated to be good the rest of the day, so if they flip a card they can do a job for me to get back on green. I get to pick the job, they do not. Usually the minute they flip a card they say "mom what can I do to get back on green?!" I have had them unload silverware from the dishwasher, pick up the toy room, clean the table, match socks on laundry day, clean up a particular mess, etc. Anything I would like done. So it's been really nice for me as well!

If they are on green by the end of the day they get to pick from the treasure box. They LOVE this. If they have stayed on green ALL day without flipping a card they get to pick 2 things. If they are on green but have had to do jobs to get there they still get to pick one thing. And if they are not on green by the time we are done eating dinner time is up to do a job and they don't get to pick from the treasure box at all that day.

This has eliminated all threats, spanks, yelling, etc. (well most of it! :)). Today I prepped the girls by telling them I was going to be on the phone for a short time and needed them to be quiet while I was on or they would have to flip to blue. I got on the phone and they both began yelling and dancing and singing around. When I hung up the phone I told them to pull a card, which they did. And immediately said what can we do to get back on green.

At the beginning they would argue or cry to not pull a card, but I would tell them if they continued carrying on, they would pull another card and soon they learned to stop. I also don't have to nag them all day to do things. I tell Parker to brush his teeth and meet me downstairs and tell him if I come in and he hasn't done it he will pull a card. So if I walk by and he is still playing Legos I just say "Oh man buddy, you aren't brushing your teeth like I asked, you're on blue" He immediately jumps up and begins brushing his teeth because he knows I will tell him if I walk by again and he isn't doing it he is on yellow and in time out.

If the kids are arguing or fighting over something I will say, "if you can't work this out, you will both take a card, so someone needs to be the peacemaker." And they honestly work it out.

They love picking from the treasure box each day and as much of a pain as it is to pull it down each night when I want them to go to bed it is well worth it for me right now. The other day Erik threatened Parker with something and Parker said "No! Daddy you forgot, you have to tell me to pull a card!" Erik thinks this is the best system we have implemented as well. As with all discipline you have to be consistent and be extra strict at the beginning.

Each morning remember to put them all back to green and let the day begin. I think each of these kids have been on red once since this started and that's all it took for them to quickly do jobs or realize I mean business and they don't want their cards flipped. Now they usually will only get to blue and quickly move back down and occasionally move to yellow.

But either way this is truly working for me! Thank you Michelle!!!